Monday, February 24, 2014


Question –
Why does campbell newman look like a bald, mangy, parrot?

Maybe most of you reading this won’t be old enough.
When I was a kid my mum used to buy these weekly magazines.
One I remember well was called “Post”.

There was a reader’s page at the back of “Post” that for some reason never had contributions from anywhere else in Australia other than the state of victoria.

Even then, the contributions most often came from rural Victoria and the bulk from some dump called horsham,victoria.
(Apparently moe, victoria hadn’t been invented then and anything from real Kelly country was still under strong censorship back in those bad old days.)

But I digress –
‘Australian Post’ came out once a week – but at least twice a month there would be some mucky/blurry, Box Brownie, black and white snapshot of some poxed old parrot – bald as a coon – but fitted out in some knitted item of avian apparel clacked together by its doting ‘mum’.

In some respects it goes to prove the honest devotion, the altruism of our Australian people.

On the other hand it ably demonstrates how sterile and futile is our pathetic existence – that all we might have left to care about in the twilight of our years is a diseased parrot in knitted overalls.

Maybe it was something to do with the ‘victorian’ mentality.

But stap me – I digress again.
This was about the premier.
Not that ‘beyond blue’ bastard from Victoria – but the baldy, poxed, by cracky, neo-nazi parachuted into queensland.

That’s right.
I was recalling how much HE looked like those succession of warty, parrots in nanny knitted, parrot sized, overalls – all those years ago in the back pages of ‘Post Magazine’.

But HE isn’t a poor poxy parrot – is he?

He isn’t a baldy joke – is he?

No way.

He’s a poisonous piece of work so far to the right of what Pauline Hansen’s hit men could ever have imagined.

He’s one particularly nasty little article – of the worst sort our remarkably flawed military system could ever produce.

And while queensland has been going through a world of upheaval and demographics change these last two decades – it seems that even the overwhelming migration of southern flat-heads and imbeciles are beginning to see through the guff being ejaculated/ expectorated/ blurted out (whatever) by this bald parrot premier and his mates in his fascist zoo.

Or so the recent Redcliffe by-election seems to prove.

So if we call this an open letter to fuhrer newman of boganvillia –
Goes this way –
“Mein fuhrer
Herr campbell newman,

Gruss Gott,

My fuhrer,
This evening I was taking out the garbage.
While I was undertaking that task – one of your police vehicles intercepted a motorist just over the road.
The officer/driver of that police vehicle alighted from his vehicle – walked forward to the vehicle he had intercepted then began bellowing at the driver of that vehicle.
In the time taken for me to drag my garbage bin the few metres to the front of my home – that strange incident was over.
The police officer was returning to his vehicle.

I am not a person of fast thinking – nor much acquainted with police procedure – yet decided to call out to that retreating policeman, something like – “Hey officer – since you have stopped there why not go and bust that meth lab over the road”.

Naturally, I knew that he’d hunch his shoulders and get back into his patrol car.

After all – he is new on the job in the electorate of the police minister, the fuhrer’s mate.

Shit yeah – questions here in boganvillia do require answers.

So my fuhrer.
What exactly gives in this outstandingly corrupt dump?

Now, in these short few months of your nauseating regime, that you’ve reduced the dump to ever worse than joh, beattie and bligh could ever have organized in their zaniest dreams – do you reckon that you can collect your pension and just move away?

Yeah. I’d expect so – you overweening creep!”

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